Heidi Blog

Today I have given the Blog over to Heidi, our Miniature Dachshund:

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Heidi so sick of Norway!!

Always hearing about how it best country in world to live!!

Heidi call bullshit!

Norway no best!!

Hold on. Heidi have joke.

What first two letters in Norway?

NO!!!!

Norway is NO country!!

Ha-ha!! Heidi very, very funny, it true. Heidi negotiating with Netflix for special. Heidi way better than Amy Schumer. So over-rated. Real hack. Schumer maybe funny for Norway, but not REAL, USA funny!

Heidi hate Amy Schumer and Norway.

It true.

Heidi hate Norway so much she been trolling Norway on Twitter!.

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Norway MFA(Ministry Foreign Affairs): Norway made education a top priority because it is not only a human right – it is a prerequisite for development.

Heidi: @NorwayMFA HUMAN RIGHT?? WHAT ABOUT DOG RIGHT?? HEIDI THINK NORWAY SMELL LIKE STINKY CAT FACE!!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Maybe stupid Norway only think about human rights because no-brain Norwegian Elkhound make animals look bad!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Norwegian Elkhound is worst! VERY BAD DOG! Huge national embarrassment!!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Norwegian Elkhound stupidest dog.

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Very bad with sex, too. Ugh.

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Heidi so embarrassed to have relations with Sköll.

Heidi: @NorwayMFA He couldn’t hunt ladybug, let alone moose! Ha!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Sköll moron. He chase sun.

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Norwegian Elkhound sit on throne of lies! Norway sit on throne of lies! Heidi hate throne of lies! Heidi hate Norway!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Heidi say NO WAY to Norway!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA You stink!!

NorwayMFA: Norway is proud of its environmental policies, and the fact that we offer more green space per person than any nation on earth!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Why Norway only care about people? Is because Norway evil?

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Norway ever think so much space because everybody hate place so much??

Heidi: @NorwayMFA It true. So much subtweeting about Norway, Norway would not believe!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Everyone talk behind Norway back. Think Norway gross! Full of stupid sweaters!

NorwayMFA: Norway now has 32,000 electric cars which is the highest rate per capita in the whole world!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Ha! Electric car what weak two-legger use at Ex! Nothing to be proud of, Notway!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Like being proud of anemia!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Think fjords stupid, too!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Fjord sound Norway make when Norway fart!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Heidi rather live in volcano than Norway!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Norway, you nothing but fake news!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Heidi think taxes are for chumps!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Ayn Rand barf if she ever step foot on parasite country!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Norway full of slackers living off bloated government!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Heidi believe if give dog a fish, feed dog, but if teach dog how to hunt, dog feed self!!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Know why nobody ever say MAKE NORWAY GREAT AGAIN? Because Norway never great!

Heidi: @NorwayMFA How many countries you conquer lately, Norway?

Heidi: @NorwayMFA Heidi rest her case. Norway, you the Bono of countries.