Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property wpdb::$categories is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/wp-db.php on line 760

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property wpdb::$post2cat is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/wp-db.php on line 760

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property wpdb::$link2cat is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/wp-db.php on line 760

Deprecated: Return type of WPCF7_FormTag::offsetExists($offset) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetExists(mixed $offset): bool, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-content/plugins/contact-form-7/includes/form-tag.php on line 396

Deprecated: Return type of WPCF7_FormTag::offsetGet($offset) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetGet(mixed $offset): mixed, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-content/plugins/contact-form-7/includes/form-tag.php on line 388

Deprecated: Return type of WPCF7_FormTag::offsetSet($offset, $value) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetSet(mixed $offset, mixed $value): void, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-content/plugins/contact-form-7/includes/form-tag.php on line 382

Deprecated: Return type of WPCF7_FormTag::offsetUnset($offset) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetUnset(mixed $offset): void, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-content/plugins/contact-form-7/includes/form-tag.php on line 400

Deprecated: Return type of WPCF7_Validation::offsetExists($offset) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetExists(mixed $offset): bool, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-content/plugins/contact-form-7/includes/validation.php on line 78

Deprecated: Return type of WPCF7_Validation::offsetGet($offset) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetGet(mixed $offset): mixed, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-content/plugins/contact-form-7/includes/validation.php on line 72

Deprecated: Return type of WPCF7_Validation::offsetSet($offset, $value) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetSet(mixed $offset, mixed $value): void, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-content/plugins/contact-form-7/includes/validation.php on line 59

Deprecated: Return type of WPCF7_Validation::offsetUnset($offset) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetUnset(mixed $offset): void, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-content/plugins/contact-form-7/includes/validation.php on line 82

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Block_Type::$skip_inner_blocks is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-block-type.php on line 357

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198
Questions to Santa | Welcome To The Magical Friendship Squad!
Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198
Skip to content

Questions to Santa

As many of you know, I’ve been working over the holidays for a service that answer’s Dear Santa letters:

Dear Santa:

I hope you enjoy your protein shake for your long journey.

I would like to know what it’s like to be Santa Claus.

  1. Is it fun to fly?
  2. Do you like being in charge of your elves?
  3. Do you like delivering presents to children?
  4. What’s your favourite hobby?
  5. What do you do over the weekend?
  6. Do you ever think of moving to a sunny place?
  7. Do you go on vacation?
  8. What’s your birthday?
  9. Do you deliver presents to pets?
  10. Do you have a pet?

Love,

Talullah from LA

 

Dear Talullah:

You should know that Santa is very grateful to you for leaving him a protein shake. You are a very sweet girl. Unfortunately, Santa is very lactose intolerant and suffers acute gastric distress whenever he has a protein shake, so he had to give it to Dasher, his lead reindeer, who is a bit of a hippy and really very experimental in his tastes. Last year Dasher tried Ayahuasca– saw serpents and had diarrhea for two days.

Santa isn’t sure how that “blessed” him with “spiritual advancement,” but whatever.

Santa will now try to answer all your questions!

  1. It is NOT fun to fly. It is VERY dangerous, especially with all the drones terrorizing the skies! Santa is only able to do it if he gets gassed up and takes his medication: 3mg of Ativan and a magic gummy.
  2. Santa is not in charge of the elves! Santa and the elves work as a team, functioning as a single unit without any hierarchy! Also, the elves are very well compensated for the work they do and the netting that surround Santa’s toy factory are NOT suicide nets like those at all the Apple factories in China! Also, any rumours you heard about elf slavery or elf sex slavery are not true! That’s fake news!
  3. Santa has had worse jobs. Working at a poultry farm, for instance.
  4. For hobbies Santa really enjoys Cosplay, voyeurism and experimenting with surveillance equipment.
  5. On the weekends Santa usually just chills and watches Netflix with the wife. Highly recommends Mindhunter.
  6. It is amazing to Santa how ill-informed people are! Little girls like you, Talullah, just live in little electronic silos, never learning anything you don’t already believe! Let Santa assure you, there is plenty of sun in the North Pole!
  7. We have been to Mar-a-Lago a number of times. Just the best. Saw Melania changing into her bikini once. Not bad at all.
  8. Santa will only tell you that he is a Leo with Pisces ascendent.
  9. No. Santa would throw-up if he ever even saw a chicken again.
  10. Several elves and a turtle.

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Query::$comments_by_type is deprecated in /home2/michafe9/public_html/wp-includes/comment-template.php on line 1525
No comments yet

Leave a Reply

You may use basic HTML in your comments. Your email address will not be published.

Subscribe to this comment feed via RSS