Colin Kaepernick, the NFL quarterback who sparked a player protest movement by taking a knee for social justice during the national anthem, has just signed on as the centrepiece of an advertising campaign with Nike that will last until 2028.

I have mixed feelings about this.

It might be inevitable, but I always find it distressing when activism is transformed into product. A recent and particularly ham-handed attempt at this occurred when Pepsi used Kendall Jenner as an instrument to co-opt the symbolism of the Black Lives Matter movement in an effort to sell soft drinks.

The ad was a failure in just about every way, but it was particularly stupefying to watch one of the most privileged people on the planet try to show us that drinking Pepsi was actually an act of resistance, and that protest itself was more like going to a really sexy block party than say, having a fire hose turned on you.

No matter, Colin Kaepernick stands on different ground, and everything I have read about him suggests he’s a good and sincere man, one who has quite clearly been denied an opportunity to work because of the way he has been expressing his political beliefs. There are rational, if unappealing, arguments on both side of this issue, but his activism, and the price he’s paid to for it, and the money he has donated to it, seem real enough. So real, in fact, that although he hasn’t actually played football for over 2 years, his jersey is still amongst the top sellers.

Nike, who not long before they signed Kaepernick, extended their deal with the NFL to supply them with uniforms and equipment for the next eight years– at a price in excess of a billion dollars– saw an opportunity to have their cake and eat it, too. The NFL is a monolith, a powerful institution that is comprised of almost 70% black players, players who are almost certain to suffer lasting and severe brain injury as a result of their jobs.

It’s a gladiatorial spectacle that has always exploited it’s workers for the benefit of gamblers and billionaires, and as wonderful as the game might be, the league that governs it is really kind of evil, and in spite of Nike’s deep and longstanding partnership with the NFL, they want to be seen as a white hat corporation. When we see that swoosh, we’re  supposed to think of commitment and excellence and fighting against the odds. We’re supposed to think of character.

Nike doesn’t want us to think about how they enable and profit off a violent and dangerous sport that cares little for the combatants,  so they hire the iconoclastic Kaepernick to sell shoes to us, thus “seizing control of the narrative.” Nike now pays Kaeprnick for his activism. In the old days, people would say they bought him. And so, with Kaepernick as the face of Nike’s campaign, we are to believe that they are the Rebel Alliance and not the Death Star.

We are to believe that Nike is about civil rights, not sweat shops.

Anyway, I don’t begrudge Kaepernick a single thing. I like his protest and I like him, and I hope that the fortune he has now earned makes him happy, and gives him an opportunity to further his activism and do whatever the hell he wants. He has earned that. Just don’t believe that Nike “has seen the light.” No, they’re just presenting the face they think we want to see, while keeping their own concealed.

To give you an idea of what I’m talking about, I present a couple of Tweets coming out of the Old Spice marketing factory:

“Why would anyone complain about it being so hot out you can cook bacon on the hood of your car? Seems like a good thing to me.”

“With Old Spice Danger Zone you’ll smell like volcano powered motorcycles and ninja punching.”

“Velociraptor training is one of those things that’s best left to the experts.”

You get the picture.

A recent Tweet by Old Spice read:

“Why is it that “fire sauce” isn’t made with any real fire? Seems like false advertizing.”

Unexpectedly, they go this response from Taco Bell that started up a great Corporate Twitter War.

Taco Bell

@OldSpice Is your deodorant made with really old spices?

Old Spice

@TacoBell You should be giving out Old Spice Danger Zone with each one of your manky burritos. Those things smell like some sweaty disease.

Taco Bell

@OldSpice Why do you collaborate with the Taliban? Doesn’t America mean anything to you?

Old Spice

@TacoBell If you were an Olympic Event you would be diarrhea.

Taco Bell

@OldSpice You’re soap on a dope.

Old Spice

@TacoBell Is it true you slaughter all your meat by crossbow?

Taco Bell

@OldSpice Aluminum Chloride, an agent commonly found in deodorants, causes breast cancer.

Old Spice

@TacoBell Your face causes breast cancer.

Taco Bell

@OldSpice Girls hate you because you smell bad, no amount of compensating will ever make up for that.

OldSpice

@TacoBell Only 36% of your “Taco Beef Filling” is actually beef. What makes up the other 64%? My guess is AIDS.

Taco Bell

@OldSpice Old, rotten, cancer-causing Spice is owned by Mormons who wear funny underwear. Also, girls hate your tiny, taco beef filling.

Old Spice

@TacoBell I think I could punch you in the face now.

Taco Bell

@OldSpice You mean flail about girlishly with your eyes closed, don’t you?

Old Spice

@TacoBell No, I mean punch you in the face with a jagged brick and then watch you bleed “Taco Beef Filling” through your hair net.

Taco Bell

@ OldSpice Are you getting turned on?

Old Spice

@TacoBell Yes.

Taco Bell

@OldSpice Let’s merge, let’s merge now!!

Old Spice

@TacoBell Turn off the web cam!! I mean, turn it on, turn it on!!