An acquaintance of mine recently posted this on her wall:
“MFA thesis defended!”
These are the comments that followed:
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Congratulations!
Way to go, Sloan!!
You did it, you’re the best!!xoxo
Awesome. Just awesome.
It must feel great to accomplish something so useful!
Congratudonlences!
That’s great, hopefully the debt won’t be too crippling!
You’re going to be a poet, I hope! A nation really can’t have too many of them!
That’s eight years spent in academia that you can be damn proud of!
So. Fucking. Brave.
Very sorry to hear this. WHAT NOW???? At least your mother died believing that you’d never finish that degree!
Thank God somebody is finally going to give some attention to Gender Dichotomies in the Kitchen: Feminine and Masculine Qualities of Spaces and Artifacts as exhibited in Queer literature of the 1990’s! It’s been a long time coming! You rawk, Sloan!
Idiot.
Hopefully after all those years you committed to that institution, you have a good relationship with them and they might offer you a job as a diversity officer or something!
Sloan, you have just taken your Blog to the next level!
So, so, so sorry to hear this. Big hugz!!
My ex works at the Starbucks on College and University, and I am sure he can get you a job there while you write your novel. Private message me.
Fantastic news! You must be super proud! See you at the Slam Poetry workshop on Sunday!
First of all, before I write my message, I want to thank Mother Earth for all the resources that she allows us to use, and honour all First Nation, Métis and Inuit people whose land we settlers now stand upon. We ask your forgiveness. YOU ARE THE BEST, SLOAN, YOU MUST BE SO PROUD!!
Have you told your psychiatrist yet?
]]>Joel Osteen @JoelOsteen 1 Jan
Don’t go into the New Year holding a grudge from last year. Leave the hurts and disappointments behind.
Michael Murray @michaelmurray 1 Jan
But I am still very angry and disappointed! Why did God forget to make me money???
Joel Osteen @JoelOsteen 1 Jan
Get ready; things are shifting in your favor. Don’t talk yourself out of it. Believe this is your year for acceleration.
Michael Murray @michaelmurrayca 1 Jan
I don’t understand. Do you mean my anger and disappointment are going to accelerate or that God is some kind of passive-aggressive reverse psychologist?
Joel Osteen @JoelOsteen 2 Jan
This is a new day. The tide of the battle has turned. Declare freedom from anything that is holding you back.
Michael Murray @michaelmurrayca 2 Jan
I declare freedom from our Visa bill. Also, amnesty from poker debt. Supernatural debt relief is completely fucking awesome!!!
Joel Osteen @JoelOsteen 3 Jan
Make room for something new. Go out today expecting blessings, divine connections & unprecedented favor.
Michael Murray @michaelmurrayca 3 Jan
I am stoked. Will wear my favourite, God-approved argyle sweater!! Look out, ladies!
Joel Osteen @JoelOsteen 4 Jan
Whatever wrong has been done in your life, get past it. God knows what He’s doing. You are not at a disadvantage.
Michael Murray @michaelmurrayca 4 Jan
I only have one lung. God made humans with two lungs. I have one. How is that not a disadvantage??!! Do you or God even have an idea what getting through a humid day with one lung is like???
Joel Osteen @JoelOsteen 5 Jan
Don’t settle in the land of barely enough. Have an abundant mentality. Make room for God to show you His goodness in a new way.
Michael Murray @michaelmurrayca 5 Jan
Still angry about your last post, but it’s true, I’ve been living in the land of barely enough WAY too long. Also, God would want me to let your last post go, right?
Joel Osteen @JoelOsteen 6 Jan
You can’t think thoughts of lack and expect to have abundance. We serve a God of more than enough.
Michael Murray @michaelmurrayca 6 Jan
And Satan is like the tax department? You’re starting to confuse me, or a demon has seized me with the bafflement. Maybe both.
Joel Osteen @JoelOsteen 7 Jan
Good news: The right people are already in your future. It’s just a matter of time before they show up.
Michael Murray @michaelmurrayca 7 Jan
And they’re bringing the money, right? God and I need to be straight on this.
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