Kind of like Academy Award Winner—only in a way that brings absolutely no positive connotations.
Back in 1988, when he won the Olympic gold medal in Seoul, Korea and shattered the world record for the 100 Metre, he was an absolute hero. I was a student in Montreal at the time and my friends and I were so euphoric, so energized by his victory that we sprinted down St. Laurent screaming for joy. It was a completely spontaneous act. We simply could not prevent ourselves from running, as every elated cell in our bodies was commanding us to do this.
Of course, you had to be willfully blind to not realize Johnson was on steroids. Even his nickname, “Big Ben,” implicitly hinted at his usage, and his eyes were jaundiced and yellow– a clear indication his liver was over-taxed from the drugs. He looked like a bull, and his mood was always remote and defensive, happier (if that could ever be a word associated with him) in the shadows than in the spotlight.
Carl Lewis, the great American athlete and his Arch Enemy, was everything that Johnson was not. Lithe, maniacally outgoing and resembling Grace Jones, Lewis loved the spotlight and seemed to effortlessly excel at every sport he touched. He sang, sold sweatshirts and played at being a kind of corporation, a latter day Muhammad Ali (only absent the charisma), if you will, and he was everything we hated about America, and then to have somebody as quiet and unloved as Johnson, not just defeat him but crush him, seemed a titanic victory for underdogs all over the world, and it was this that sent us shouting down the street.
IN YOUR FACE, USA!!
Of course, a couple of days later it was revealed that Johnson was doping. He was stripped of his medal and ever since has been known as “disgraced sprinter Ben Johnson.” Post fall, he has been in trouble for pointing a starter’s pistol– from his Porsche– at another motorist while on the highway, was hired by Gaddafi as a football coach for his son (resulting in the son being suspended from the league for drug use), raced a horse and a stock car, headed a failed clothing line called Catch Me, chased a Romani gang who robbed him of his wallet in Rome and failed to catch them, and endorsed a sport’s drink called Cheetah Power Surge, the commercials of which player off the fact Johnson was a cheater.
It’s been this nearly-forgotten way for almost thirty years, and it must get kind of exhausting, but every once in awhile Johnson raises his head from the shadows, most recently emerging for a photo-op to lend his support to Toronto Mayor Rob Ford’s unceasing and exhaustless bid for re-election. Disgrace, one would presume, and not her better angel redemption, being what brought the two men together under the Big, Confused Tent that is Ford Nation. *1
*1 It’s as if Marvel Comics was creating a super-group of villains in the Ford camp, all readying for some great apocalyptic battle to take place in a future issue.
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Donald J Trump 39 m
Our nation is a once great nation divided.
Donald J Trump 43 m
Our country is now in serious and unprecedented trouble…like never before.
Donald J Trump 49m
Our country is a total sham and travesty. We are not a democracy!
Donald J Trump 51m
More votes equals a loss…revolution!
Donald J Trump 51m
Let’s fight like hell and stop this great and disgusting injustice! The world is laughing at us.
Donald J Trump 53m
We can’t let this happen. We should march on Washington and stop this travesty. Our nation is totally divided
Donald J Trump 54 m
The phony electoral college made a laughing stock out of our nation. The loser one!
Donald J Trump 1 hr
He lost the popular vote by a lot and won the election. We should have a revolution in this country!
Donald J Trump 1hr 2 m
I can’t stop crying. America died.
Donald J Trump 1 hr 9m
I make the best luxury golf resorts in the world. Quality. 10% off for Revolutionaries.
Donald J Trump 1 hr 21m
Don’t miss the Trump Universe Pageant in Atlantic City 2013. We will rebuild with sexy ladies!
Donald J Trump 1 hr 23m
I offer 5 million dollars to the first patriot that maims our imposter president or lures him into sex tape situation.
Donald J Trump 1 hr 23 m
Patriot also gets a Lexus, quality vehicle with power windows. Gold.
Donald J Trump 1 hr 37m
Hate his imposter president’s monkey ears! Streets must flow with blood!
Donald J Trump 1 hr 39m
It will be AIDs blood, so wear rain boots!
Donald J Trump 1 hr 41m
Out of vodka and bored of my hookers.
Donald J Trump 1 hr 42m
Burning cigarette into woman’s flesh less energizing than would have thought.
Donald J Trump 1 hr 48m
She a good screamer, though, I’ll give her that.
Donald J Trump 1 hr 51m
Takes a lot of moxie to get on the Apprentice.
Donald J Trump 1 hr 52m
Moving to Dubai. Fuck America in the face. America, you’re fucking fired!
Donald J Trump 2hr 2m
Condos starting from just $1,699,000. Be amongst the first to live in most prestigious location in all of NYC!
Donald J Trump 2 hr 7 m
Thanks a lot Christians for not showing up to vote. You disgust me.
Donald J Trump 2 hr 18m
Can’t believe we have a Korean President! They eat dogs!!
Donald J Trump 2 hr 24m
Building a quality bomb. Trump quality. Will get the job done.
]]>“And all of your joys, blossoming right here in front of you,” I said.
He stopped, looked irritated, “If she just asked calmly and politely this would all be over, but she won’t!” And then he looked down directly at his daughter, “Will she?” And then he strode off, moving quickly as if in some competition.
As I was withdrawing money from an ATM in Koreatown I watched a young woman having an animated conversation with a bank employee who was sitting behind a desk. I watched for about a minute as information was transferred back and forth and then suddenly something happened in the conversation and the young woman, now delighted, stood up and threw her arms around the bank employee. The two women hugged there for a minute, both of them just beaming, dissolving into the most beautiful part of their day.
Right outside of the bank a man was trying to control a bottle of pop that was overflowing and spraying all over the place. Shielding himself and with a big grin on his face, he said, “And it says right here on the side, do not shake!” His friends laughed and pointed, also dodging the fizzy jets, all of it having the feeling of watching a bunch of children run through the water sprinkler or playing in the street while the fire hydrant streamed.
At Queen Video there was a new clerk doing everything he possible could to solidify the stereotypical image of a video store clerk. All worked up, he was in the middle of rant when I got to the cash, complaining bitterly about the video renting public and movies that “were all tone, no plot.” When I put my DVD down on the counter he picked it up and appraised it as if it were a jewel.
“Senna, a solid documentary, good choice.”
Outside of Sarah’s Shawarma and Falafal I tied the dog up to a post while I went inside to grab some lunch. Spotting our dog looking lonely, a woman came hurrying over to offer her comfort. She had a worried look on her face, this woman. Her eyes darted about in pursuit of whatever owner had abandoned their dog in such a way, her nose twitching as if a disapproving mouse or rabbit. She had crazy, grey hair that looked like it had been electrocuted out into improbable vectors, and I kept a very close eye on her as my sandwich was made. After about one minute she left, journeying further into a day that would no doubt lead to an escalating series of upsets.
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