@michaelmurrayca I’m 20 rows from the front, dead centre. Eye of the storm, baby, eye of the storm.
@michaelmurrayca Oprah just took stage to sound of delirious fans. Tried to give her my manuscript but failed. Awkward moment.
@michaelmurrayca No, not failed. Just given another opportunity to build my life.
@michaelmurrayca “You honour me by being here,” Oprah says, “Real question is why are you here?”
@michaelmurrayca “Love tittie shows!” I yell. Unsophisticated crowd doesn’t appreciate joke.
@michaelmurrayca Feminazis everywhere. VERY sour looks.
@michaelmurrayca “As small girl, grandma said I had to learn to hang clothes for the life I would have. Inside voice said no.”
@michaelmurrayca Blahblahblahblahblah #Oprahmanuscripthater
@michaelmurrayca There are like 8 Asian people in the crowd.
@michaelmurrayca Wonder what’s up with that.
@michaelmurrayca Could it be that the Asians hate Oprah????
@michaelmurrayca Oprah says she was Miss Fire Prevention at 16. “I could out talk those Southern girls.
@michaelmurrayca Oprah thinks she’s better than Southern girls. #Dixiechickswillwritesongaboutthis
@michaelmurrayca “Nothing is happening willy-nilly to you. You’re creating your own life.”
@michaelmurrayca Three women behind me just started to cry.
@michaelmurrayca One of them is really letting it go. Worried she might lose control of her bladder.
@michaelmurrayca Just looked behind me, major sobber has Oprah tattoo on her calf.
@michaelmurrayca O is part comedian, part actor, part preacher, part big sister and all woman!!
@michaelmurrayca Funny, self-deprecating and riveting. Crowd is completely enthralled.
@michaelmurrayca Best. Storyteller. On. Planet.
@michaelmurrayca Important to note Oprah has great hair today, cascading curls. Also, purple sparkly dress with contrasting purple shrug.
@michaelmurrayca I would fucking follow that woman into war.
@michaelmurrayca Would fight in mud.
@michaelmurrayca Oprah is like a black Dolly Parton.
@michaelmurrayca Would fight like hell for Dolly Parton, too.
@michaelmurrayca Swear to God they just did something to make place smell like pumpkins and vanilla.
@michaelmurrayca Going to note that in my gratitude journal. Grateful for pumpkin/vanilla scent.
@michaelmurrayca “My dream is to be able use my life to touch yours. To live on the edge of glory and sit with you.”
@michaelmurrayca People are going crazy, like she took her top off or something.
@michaelmurrayca If she wanted to touch my life, why not take manuscript???? #Oprahcaughtinlie
@michaelmurrayca “Sit. Feast on your life.” Fade to black and Oprah shouts “Ottawaaaaa” as pulsing beat starts and standing ovation.
@michaelmurrayca Then she gives away her Manolo Blahniks. Just took em off and put gold and diamond slippers on. Asked who in audience is size 10.5 and voila!
@michaelmurrayca Pretty sure Oprah feet must smell like pumpkin and vanilla.
* I must note that Ottawa Citizen megastar Louisa Taylor @louisataylorCIT was also live Tweeting the Oprah event and that as it turns out, I Tweeted maybe some of the exact same thing that she did, almost as if I wasn’t there at all. But no worries, our legal system will sort it all out!
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