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Sexy Women – Welcome To The Magical Friendship Squad! http://michaelmurray.ca Michael Murray Writes Things Wed, 27 Mar 2013 16:30:51 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.5.3 Toronto Mayor Rob Ford: What The Mayor Was Thinking http://michaelmurray.ca/toronto-mayor-rob-ford-what-the-mayor-was-thinking http://michaelmurray.ca/toronto-mayor-rob-ford-what-the-mayor-was-thinking#respond Fri, 08 Mar 2013 18:50:14 +0000 http://michaelmurray.ca/?p=3202 Toronto Mayor Rob Ford calls it getting ahead of the envelope. Ever since our days drinking together when we were both enrolled at Carleton University in Ottawa, Rob has been almost preternaturally media savvy. He likes to get ahead of the story, predicting where a problem might arise and then defusing it before it catches fire in the media. Unfortunately for Rob, he’s never been a particularly photogenic man, and many of his enemies seek to exploit this vulnerability and cast him in the least flattering light imaginable. With this in mind, Rob contacted me late one night and asked if I could help him “get ahead of the envelope” when it came to the anti-Ford paparazzi.

Based on the old New York Times Photo series, What They Were Thinking, I came up with an idea to post the unflattering picture of Ford before it made a splash, and have the Mayor, in his own words, tell the public exactly what he was thinking the moment the photograph was snapped. This way, we would be ahead of the envelope and we could see the inner, vulnerable Mayor.

This photograph, taken late Thursday night at a CJPAC event, shows the Mayor kindly posing for a photograph with a fan.

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What The Mayor Was Thinking:

“Well, it was International Woman’s Day, so I was thinking about all the amazing contributions women have made to the world. If it weren’t for women, I don’t think that there would be any cookies, babies, or lingerie football, and I bet Cute Overload would have tanked. There’s tons of other stuff, too, and I was thinking about that, also. I mean, women have written books and starred in movies, there have even been lady Mayors! It’s amazing, when you think about it, and I was considering all of it, the sorts of make-out music they like and how they’re scared of spiders. I was really feeling the lady vibe right then. Like, the way that they smell, the way they feel, and the way that their voices are higher and softer than your own—it’s just so cool. You know, Jessica Alba, Jennifer Aniston, The Kardashians, Jennifer Lawrence, Pamela Anderson, hell, even Lindsay Lohan, and Scarlett Johansson, yeah, her big time…The list just goes on and on. Women are fucking awesome, and I really like it when they’re around, especially when I’m feeling a little lonely, and believe me, even a big, cool Mayor like me gets lonely from time to time.”

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*Late on Thursday night while at a CJPAC event, Sarah Thomson, a former candidate for Mayor, posted the photograph of Rob and her at the function, stating that he said she should have been in Florida with him last week because his wife wasn’t there and then grabbed her ass.

]]> http://michaelmurray.ca/toronto-mayor-rob-ford-what-the-mayor-was-thinking/feed 0 Unedited Donald Trump Tweets following Obama’s Presidential Victory http://michaelmurray.ca/unedited-donald-trump-tweets-following-obamas-presidential-victory http://michaelmurray.ca/unedited-donald-trump-tweets-following-obamas-presidential-victory#comments Wed, 07 Nov 2012 17:53:55 +0000 http://michaelmurray.ca/?p=2839 Donald Trump, as you may have heard, had a Twitter meltdown Tuesday night after Barack Obama defeated Mitt Romney in the 2012 Presidential election. Shortly after his intemperate screed, Trump began to edit and take down some of his more inflammatory posts, but I have a record of the originals, which I am now going to post for posterity:

Donald J Trump     39 m

Our nation is a once great nation divided.

Donald J Trump     43 m

Our country is now in serious and unprecedented trouble…like never before.

Donald J Trump       49m

Our country is a total sham and travesty. We are not a democracy!

Donald J Trump        51m

More votes equals a loss…revolution!

Donald J Trump        51m

Let’s fight like hell and stop this great and disgusting injustice! The world is laughing at us.

Donald J Trump       53m

We can’t let this happen. We should march on Washington and stop this travesty. Our nation is totally divided

Donald J Trump        54 m

The phony electoral college made a laughing stock out of our nation. The loser one!

Donald J Trump        1 hr

He lost the popular vote by a lot and won the election. We should have a revolution in this country!

Donald J Trump         1hr 2 m

I can’t stop crying. America died.

Donald J Trump          1 hr 9m

I make the best luxury golf resorts in the world. Quality. 10% off for Revolutionaries.

Donald J Trump         1 hr 21m

Don’t miss the Trump Universe Pageant in Atlantic City 2013. We will rebuild with sexy ladies!

Donald J Trump     1 hr 23m

I offer 5 million dollars to the first patriot that maims our imposter president or lures him into sex tape situation.

Donald J Trump 1 hr 23 m

Patriot also gets a Lexus, quality vehicle with power windows. Gold.

Donald J Trump 1 hr 37m

Hate his imposter president’s monkey ears! Streets must flow with blood!

Donald J Trump 1 hr 39m

It will be AIDs blood, so wear rain boots!

Donald J Trump 1 hr 41m

Out of vodka and bored of my hookers.

Donald J Trump 1 hr 42m

Burning cigarette into woman’s flesh less energizing than would have thought.

Donald J Trump 1 hr 48m

She a good screamer, though, I’ll give her that.

Donald J Trump 1 hr 51m

Takes a lot of moxie to get on the Apprentice.

Donald J Trump 1 hr 52m

Moving to Dubai. Fuck America in the face. America, you’re fucking fired!

Donald J Trump 2hr 2m

Condos starting from just $1,699,000. Be amongst the first to live in most prestigious location in all of NYC!

Donald J Trump 2 hr 7 m

Thanks a lot Christians for not showing up to vote. You disgust me.

Donald J Trump 2 hr 18m

Can’t believe we have a Korean President! They eat dogs!!

Donald J Trump 2 hr 24m

Building a quality bomb. Trump quality. Will get the job done.

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