THE SITUATION
I was really looking forward to having sushi for lunch. I walked all the way to Sushi on Bloor and then back home, and when I put MY LUNCH down on the coffee table and went ( FOR JUST ONE MINUTE) to get some water, the dog ate every last bit of sushi that there was.
YOUR MOODS (rate each mood 0-100%)
Enraged 180%
Depressed 90%
Humiliated 60%
THOUGHTS (highlight the HOT thought)
I will regret killing the dog.
Rachelle will be inconsolable if I kill the dog.
HOT THOUGHT—SHOULD I STILL KILL THE DOG?
Can you go to jail for killing a dog?
Will I have a heart attack if I attack the dog?
Why does the dog hate me?
What does it feel like to be an Alpha?
Why is the world against me?
THE SITUATION
Rachelle and I were watching Game of Thrones and Ygritte, Jon Snow’s love, died.
YOUR MOODS
Depressed 200%
Frustrated 200%
Angry 200%
Hurt 200%
Insecure 30%
THOUGHTS
WHY THE FUCK DOES GAME OF THRONES KEEP KILLING OFF ALL THE PEOPLE I LIKE?? JESUS! THE PEOPLE WHO MAKE THE SHOW ARE MONSTERS!! THE LOVE STORY BETWEEN YGRITTE AND JON WAS COMPLEX AND TRUE AND ONE OF THE FEW GLIMPSES OF LIGHT IN THE DEATH AND SORROW FEST THAT IS GAME OF THRONES AND THEN THEY GO AND KILL HER! IT WAS MEAN, JUST FUCKING CRUEL! CAN THERE BE NO BEAUTY IN THIS WORLD???!!! (THIS IS ALL A HOT THOUGHT) I TOOK AN ATIVAN HOPING TO RELAX, BUT IT DID NOT KICK IN FOR AN HOUR AT WHICH POINT THE EPISODE WAS ALREADY OVER. THE DARK MOOD STAYED WITH ME FOR DAYS.
THE SITUATION
Jose Fernandez, star pitcher of the Florida Marlins and of my fantasy baseball team A Fury of Pigeons, had season ending surgery thus scuttling my chances of winning the league this year.
YOUR MOODS
Depression (100%)
Anger (100%)
Jealousy (80%)
Bitterness (200%)
THOUGHTS
This cannot be happening.
Somebody is playing a big trick on me.
It’s a massive conspiracy.
There is a massive conspiracy afoot to make me have a heart attack.
HOT THOUGHT–I LOVE JOSE FERNANDEZ SO MUCH.
I love Jose Fernandez more than I loved Ygritte.
]]>
1. The Smiling Poncho (All staff must wear a poncho, and the chef will wear a sombrero with little, hooked fish hanging off the brim. It will be fun!)
2. Fish and Ships (You will sell ship knickknacks as an alternate revenue stream at the front desk.)
3. Clamorama (Deep-fried clams will be a specialty.)
4. Blood In The Water (This Risto will have a shark-attack themed décor. It will really stand out from the crowd and when you order the signature plate of paella, the theme music to Jaws will play as the serving staff brings it out. We will be a destination for birthday and bachelor parties, so if legal, we will have all serving staff working in bikinis and speedos. GAY FRIENDLY.)
4. Los Peces Sexy (Obviously, this means The Sexy Fish in Spanish. Consider Tango dance lessons in the evening?)
5. Scales And Males (This would be a gay restaurant)
6. Scales And Tails and Males (This would be a more flamboyant and risque gay restaurant)
7. Something Fishy. (This is cute, and I think that each night you should stage a marine-themed murder mystery production as entertainment for the dining guests.)
8. Crabbies (Part of the appeal of this incarnation would be the gruff, sailor-like atmosphere and service.)
9. Fishing for a compliment? (Could become popular with people on first dates!)
10. The Fishcotheque (On the weekends it a disco and fine seafood restaurant.)
]]>