It had been ages since my last driver\u2019s lesson and I have to admit I was kind of excited to get behind the wheel and see Alpas, my driving instructor, again. I showed up early and waited outside of the Donlands subway station for him. Just across from the Toronto East General Withdrawal Management Centre, a teenage couple sat out at a patio. The boy wore a Raptors cap and had a gentle face, and the girl, dressed for a provocative summer, had a flirtatious mane of hair that was designed for tossing. Holding her iPhone, the boy said, \u201cNo, I\u2019m not going to go and look at naked photos of you.\u201d She just stared at him, as if he was weak and pitiful. I walked on by, taking up residence at a picnic table where I waited for my instructor.<\/p>\n
In short order he showed up, letting another student out of the car and then waving me in.<\/p>\n
Me: Alpas, good to see you! You\u2019re looking well, that\u2019s a spiffy Dashoko you\u2019re wearing!<\/p>\n
Alpas: You mean Dashiki, but thank you, my wife bought it for me.<\/p>\n
Me: Sorry, Dashiko.<\/p>\n
Alpas: Dashiki.<\/p>\n
Me: Yes, well it\u2019s way better than that last thing you were wearing, that was ratty. How many wives do you have, anyway? Is it one of those situations where one wife has really good taste in Dashoks and the other doesn\u2019t have a clue?<\/p>\n
Alpas: I only have one wife, Michael, just like you. We should start with our lesson now. I will need you to concentrate if you are to improve.<\/p>\n
Me: I am focused.<\/p>\n
Alpas: Please start. Pull out into the street slowly, remembering to check your rear view mirror and signal.<\/p>\n
Me: What?<\/p>\n
Alpas: Remember to watch for other cars.<\/p>\n
Me: Rachelle and I just got back from Cuba, they\u2019ve got some crazy, beautiful cars there.<\/p>\n