Do you believe in the future?<\/p>\n

I do.<\/p>\n

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In fact, like the great dissolute songstress Whitney Houston, I believe that children are our future. If we treat them well, they will shovel the driveway, or something. They will be like little slaves, which is why I want one. However, unless some sort of dodgy \u201cmiracle\u201d takes place, I won\u2019t be having any little slaves in the future. You see, after taking an ill-advised vacation in Cuba, I was rendered, \u201cun hombre con un conteo de espermatozoides diminuto, peque\u00f1o,\u201d and without the intervention of science, my wife and I will never be able to have the little slaves we\u2019ve always dreamed about.<\/p>\n

Now, we\u2019re poor people, and the only way we can afford the expenses of tinkering with God\u2019s will, is to sell our car, a stunning sex machine of a Honda Accord Sedan LX. This little dreamboat was born in 2006 and has the gentlest 137,700 Km on it you can imagine. It\u2019s like all it\u2019s kilometerage was acquired under doctor\u2019s supervision. It\u2019s sapphire blue, the same colour you always wanted to animate your lover\u2019s eyes. It has a perfect body. A calendar body. You will want to marry this car and make little baby cars with it.<\/p>\n

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All we are asking is $9,500.That\u2019s practically nothing when it comes to cars that can speak in a British accent.<\/p>\n

And remember, by buying this car you are investing in the future, for we will immediately turn the money over to doctors so that they might create for us a test tube slave, I mean baby. Our child might save the life of your child. Think about this.<\/p>\n

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This car, this beautiful, never-been-smoked-in and obedient car, is an automatic. It has never been crashed into anything, and it has an impressive engine that boasts all the things you want in an engine. The car is goddamn perfect\u2013 it was even blessed by a priest! And if you like to party, well, you should know that the stereo has a CD player, 120 watt speakers, power windows and locks, a folding rear seat back and an air conditioner that is so effective, so good at it\u2019s job, that you will want to get close to somebody just to warm up.<\/p>\n

Did I mention that the car has 4-wheel ABS, grey fabric interior, has passed all drug tests and is E-tested and certified? I meant to. I also want you to know that beautiful French actress Marion Cottilard rode in this car. She smelled like pumpkin and vanilla.<\/p>\n

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And that it\u2019s only $9,500.<\/p>\n

Goddamn, this is the deal of a lifetime!<\/p>\n

Buy our car, the future depends on it!<\/p>\n

Reply to:\u00a0bwgbv-3107894753@sale.craigslist.org<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Do you believe in the future?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":2359,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[342,343,138,335,177,346,347,341,337,151,69,339,96,333,345,55,338,344,46],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2354"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2354"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2354\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2428,"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2354\/revisions\/2428"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2359"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2354"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2354"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2354"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}