I have always found it best to watch Archery while quietly sipping Vodka. Archery. It sounds so elegant, and at first it seems very innocent, like watching rich-person darts. But as the Vodka begins to settle and the thuck of arrow into target starts to make a deep and satisfying sound that speaks to your core, you realize how much you despise your job and suddenly it\u2019s like, \u201cYeah, I really get the Olympic spirit.\u201d<\/p>\n
Table Tennis reminds me of a Wes Anderson film and I like to watch it wearing shorts and drinking coke. It makes me feel like a boy, a boy with an unlimited future where anything is possible including an Olympic gold medal in a child\u2019s sport, instead of the middle-aged man who keeps getting ads for Gout medication popping up in his Facebook feed.<\/p>\n
Sailing is a sport I like to watch while drinking gin and tonics. I usually dress for this event, in the sort of outfit that would get you beat-up on buses or in certain towns. Actually, I should tell the truth here, I don\u2019t really watch sailing, but fall into a kind of glamour stupor with sailing as the backdrop. I dream, and yes, these dreams include supermodels in bikinis and helicopter pads and then supermodels not in bikinis. Long live the one percent!<\/p>\n