While cycling through Koreatown the other day I spotted a garbage bin on Bloor Street that had smoke drifting out of it. You should know that when I\u2019m zipping along on my bike and wearing my purple helmet I feel a little bit like a superhero. It\u2019s true. I surge with confidence and leadership skills, and so seeing what could potential be a fire, I screeched to a halt and leapt out to face the bin.<\/p>\n

There were a few other people standing around watching the bin.<\/p>\n

A woman walking a poodle, a consensus builder, I think, said, \u201cWe should call 311!\u201d<\/p>\n

Street guy: \u201cYou mean 911, lady.\u201d<\/p>\n

Woman: \u201cNo, 311, it\u2019s the number you call when you have a city related question or see somebody committing graffiti!\u201d<\/p>\n

Street guy: \u201cCommitting graffiti?\u201d<\/p>\n

Woman: \u201c The garbage bin is city property, they must have a protocol for such an event!\u201d<\/p>\n

I decided to show some leadership.<\/p>\n

Me: \u201c No, this isn\u2019t a situation for government intervention, this is a time for us to come together as citizens.\u201d<\/p>\n

Woman: \u201cI still think we should call 311.\u201d<\/p>\n

Me: \u201cI\u2019m going to put out the goddamn fire.\u201d<\/p>\n

<\/a><\/p>\n

( this is the bin that was smoking)<\/p>\n

Street guy: \u201cWho made you boss? I think we should just let it burn, man!\u201d<\/p>\n

I ignored him, reached into my knapsack and pulled out a bottle of water. I then poured all of it into the burning bin. Nothing happened.<\/p>\n

Street Guy: \u201cNice job, Superman. You just poured your water into the recycling slot instead of the litter slot where the smoke is coming from.\u201d<\/p>\n

I put my hands on my hips and sighed.<\/p>\n

More smoke was coming out.<\/p>\n

Woman: \u201cI\u2019m calling 311.\u201d<\/p>\n

I pushed open the litter slot and peered in. I couldn\u2019t see a thing.<\/p>\n

Once again I put my hands on my hips and sighed.<\/p>\n

Me: \u201cI\u2019m out of water.\u201d<\/p>\n

Woman: \u201cI\u2019m taking my dog away, this is becoming a dangerous situation.\u201d<\/p>\n

Street guy: \u201c Dangerous situation? I live on the streets, now that\u2019s a dangerous situation!\u00a0 This is nothing! Somebody flicked a cigarette butt into a fucking garbage can and now you two think the world is about to end!\u201d<\/p>\n

The woman quickly walked her dog away.<\/p>\n

\u201cDid you call 311?\u201d I shouted after her.<\/p>\n

She did not respond– she was gone, like a ghost.<\/p>\n

Me: \u201cI\u2019m going to buy another bottle of water.\u201d<\/p>\n

Street guy: \u201cFuck the one percent. You\u2019ll buy water for a pretend fire but not for me, and then you\u2019ll pour that water down the wrong slot again.\u201d<\/p>\n

I went into the local corner store and bought two bottles of water, but when I came out the man who was running the food truck parked in front of the smoking garbage bin was spraying it down with a hose. He looked like an older, angry version of one of the Mario Brothers. When he saw me holding the two bottles of water in my hands that I had just bought he gave me a disdainful, pained look. And then he shook his head, rethinking something, \u201cCome, come, I give you a free slushie, you do the best with what God gave you. What flavour you like?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBlue,\u201d I said.<\/p>\n

\u201cBlue,\u201d he repeated, \u201con the house.\u201d<\/p>\n

<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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