As many of you know, I used to work as a columnist at the Ottawa Citizen. Sometimes, on very rare and desperate occasions, they will contact me and ask if I\u2019m interested in doing something. This happened just the other day, as the newspaper star they had lined up to Live Tweet Oprah\u2019s appearance in Ottawa on Wednesday, had a legal emergency that prevented her from attending. And so it came to pass that I was asked if I could do it, a job I readily accepted. What follows are my Tweets from Oprah\u2019s appearance before nearly 15, 000 fans at a hockey rink outside of the city:<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca I\u2019m 20 rows from the front, dead centre. Eye of the storm, baby, eye of the storm.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca Oprah just took stage to sound of delirious fans. Tried to give her my manuscript but failed. Awkward moment.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca No, not failed. Just given another opportunity to build my life.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca \u201cYou honour me by being here,\u201d Oprah says, \u201cReal question is why are you here?\u201d<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca \u00a0\u201cLove tittie shows!\u201d I yell. Unsophisticated crowd doesn\u2019t appreciate joke.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca Feminazis everywhere. VERY sour looks.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca \u201cAs small girl, grandma said I had to learn to hang clothes for the life I would have. Inside voice said no.\u201d<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca Blahblahblahblahblah #Oprahmanuscripthater<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca There are like 8 Asian people in the crowd.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca Wonder what\u2019s up with that.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca Could it be that the Asians hate Oprah????<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca Oprah says she was Miss Fire Prevention at 16. \u201cI could out talk those Southern girls.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca Oprah thinks she\u2019s better than Southern girls. #Dixiechickswillwritesongaboutthis<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca \u201cNothing is happening willy-nilly to you. You\u2019re creating your own life.\u201d<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca Three women behind me just started to cry.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca One of them is really letting it go. Worried she might lose control of her bladder.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca Just looked behind me, major sobber has Oprah tattoo on her calf.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca O is part comedian, part actor, part preacher, part big sister and all woman!!<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca Funny, self-deprecating and riveting. Crowd is completely enthralled.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca Best. Storyteller. On. Planet.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca Important to note Oprah has great hair today, cascading curls. Also, purple sparkly dress with contrasting purple shrug.<\/p>\n

<\/a><\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca I would fucking follow that woman into war.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca Would fight in mud.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca Oprah is like a black Dolly Parton.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca Would fight like hell for Dolly Parton, too.<\/p>\n

<\/a><\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca Swear to God they just did something to make place smell like pumpkins and vanilla.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca Going to note that in my gratitude journal. Grateful for pumpkin\/vanilla scent.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca \u201cMy dream is to be able use my life to touch yours. To live on the edge of glory and sit with you.\u201d<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca People are going crazy, like she took her top off or something.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca If she wanted to touch my life, why not take manuscript???? #Oprahcaughtinlie<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca \u201cSit. Feast on your life.\u201d Fade to black and Oprah shouts \u201cOttawaaaaa\u201d as pulsing beat starts and standing ovation.<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca Then she gives away her Manolo Blahniks. Just took em off and put gold and diamond slippers on. Asked who in audience is size 10.5 and voila!<\/p>\n

@michaelmurrayca Pretty sure Oprah feet must smell like pumpkin and vanilla.<\/p>\n

* I must note that Ottawa Citizen megastar Louisa Taylor @louisataylorCIT was also live Tweeting the Oprah event and that as it turns out, I Tweeted maybe some of the exact same thing that she did, almost as if I wasn’t there at all. But no worries, our legal system will sort it all out!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

As many of you know, I used to work as a columnist at the Ottawa Citizen.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":3320,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[3],"tags":[138,1349,815,1348,783,36,1345,874,1343,1342,434,80,69,1340,1341,1346,1344,539,1347,291,498],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3319"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3319"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3319\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3369,"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3319\/revisions\/3369"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3320"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3319"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3319"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/michaelmurray.ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3319"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}