Having grown completely exasperated with the weekly New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest, I have asked my 75 year old mother if she would be so kind as to contribute. What follows are her submissions over the last month and a half:<\/p>\n

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My cat Frito would love it here!<\/p>\n

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My cat Frito would like to take it from here, Simpson!<\/p>\n

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Somebody here isn\u2019t eating a balanced diet and if they\u2019re not careful they\u2019re going to get the gout!<\/p>\n

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I wouldn\u2019t be so pleased with myself if I were you, one day you\u2019ll get yours, and let me tell you, it won’t be nice!<\/p>\n

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Old Macdonald\u2019s drinking caught up with him and he died two years ago. He had cirrhosis of the liver and then was taken by pneumonia. Just too weak to fight.<\/p>\n

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You, you\u2019re just another good-time Charlie, you’re not getting the eggs for free from me, \u00a0buzz-off!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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