KKK

The Internet activist group Anonymous has taken over the US Twitter account of the Ku Klux Klan after the KKK began to threaten protestors awaiting the grand jury decision on the Michael Brown case. A friend of mine works with Anonymous and asked me if I could seamlessly take over the Twitter feed, making only subtle changes but still spreading disinformation in an effort to undermine the organization. I accepted:

@KuKluxKlanUSA: Finally have the night to myself to work on my novel. The window’s open, I’m drinking Jack and Coke and the KKKat is purring on my lap. #LifeIsGoodButForTheBlacksRuiningAmerica

@KuKluxKlanUSA: Kolby, a sensitive, young White Supremacist and gifted tattoo artist is the main character.

@KuKluxKlanUSA: Lost vision in his left eye due to a hunting accident and wears an eye patch. Some say this is when he got “the gift.”

@KuKluxKlanUSA: He goes into a trance whenever he’s inking, and the tattoo he creates foretells the future of the person who gets it. It dooms them to their fate!

@KuKluxKlanUSA: Working title: White Tattoo Prophet.

@KuKluxKlanUSA: Minorities are ruining America!!!

@KuKluxKlanUSA: Taco Tuesday’s at Pigglys!! $2 each!!

@KuKluxKlanUSA: Ate 19 of ‘em. No one else even close. #WhitePride!!

@KuKluxKlanUSA: Stained my hood a bit, but it was worth it.

@KuKluxKlanUSA: Hood is very hot, especially when engaged in competitive eating.

@KuKluxKlanUSA: Will take it up at next meeting, as I know I’m not alone in this observation.

@KuKluxKlanUSA: Aryan Brotherhood will do anything to KKKeep America pure!!!

@KuKluxKlanUSA: Not afraid to stain our hoods for the cause! #AmeriKKAForever!!!

@KuKluxKlanUSA: @KlansvilleVA Are you sure tacos are Mexican????

@KuKluxKlanUSA: @KlansvilleVA Thought for sure they were American.

@KuKluxKlanUSA: @KlansvilleVA Really? Kind of like Mexican pizza pockets, I guess.

@KukluxKlanUSA: @KlansvilleVA Well, shoot.

@KuKluxKlanUSA: Illegal, lazy, dope dealing Mexicans trying to take over America with their sneaky and delicious food. FIGHT BACK AMERIKKKA!!

@KuKluxKlanUSA: Salma Hayek would make a good sex slave. #SubjugateTheirWomen!

@KuKluxKlanUSA: @KlansvilleVA My cousin was a sex slave for two years. Said it wasn’t so bad.

@KuKluxKlanUSA: @KlansvilleVA: Said the food was pretty good and she had cable.

@KuKluxKlanUSA: @KlansvilleVA: No, I’m still single.

@KuKluxKlanUSA: @KlansvilleVA: Tried a few dating sites but nothing worked. Considering Tinder.

@KuKluxKlanUSA: @KlansvilleVA: “Looking for sweet girl who’s also not afraid to die for the cause!!” This is my profile pic.

@KuKluxKlanUSA: @KlansvilleVA: Yeah, thanks bud, I’m sure it’ll work out, too!

@KuKluxKlanUSA: The White Brotherhood will never die!!

@KuKluxKlanUSA: I really do hate the black race, but I have to say, Dr. Neil deGrasse Tyson is one impressive man.

@KuKluxKlanUSA: Kind of wish he was white and had an incoherent rage against all minorities. That would be cool.

@KuKluxKlanUSA: I mean, if he just applied his intellect to hate and violence instead of astrophysics, he could really make something of himself, you know?

@KuKluxKlanUSA: Also wish Will Smith was white! What an actor!!

@KuKluxKlanUSA: And Denzel. Denzel rules. (That stare. OMG!)

@KuKluxKlanUSA: Babe (White!) of the week:

@KuKluxKlanUSA: KKKristmas is coming up soon! Don’t forget to pick up your Ladies of the KKK Kalendar! All proceeds go to hate.