Heidi Blog

Today I have given the Blog over to Heidi, our Miniature Dachshund.

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Canadian Thanksgiving weekend just pass and Heidi always like to take moment at this time of year to think about all things she grateful for. Help Heidi keep perspective. Good exercise for soul.

Heidi very thankful so pretty.

Very, very good looking dog. When Heidi walk down street she like rock star! People come running, “Oh, you so adorable! Such gorgeous dog!!” Swoon when they feel my velvet ears! Can’t stop talking about how Heidi’s coat of fur glisten like maybe woven by angels. Treats just fall out of two-leggers because of Heidi beauty. Must be awful to be ugly squirrel, cat dumb face or disease pigeon that can’t tell difference between cigarette butt or french fry!

Heidi also thankful to be so athletic! Heidi fastest Dachshund in all of Toronto area! Run like a rocket! Black ninja flash blur by all slow creatures of the land, Heidi always first to ball!

And when Heidi get trophy ball, she do what she want with it. Heidi so good no need to retrieve ball, just capture and kill ball! Underling come get ball later. Heidi thankful for that.

Heidi grateful for smells. Heidi like all sorts of smells. Autumn good time for smells, so much rotting!!

Heidi give thanks that her sex tape with Juno, the Miniature Pinscher who think he greatest animal on planet, was taken off of Cute Overload. Heidi very young and vulnerable when tape made. Coerced. Whole episode very embarrassing for Heidi, and think that Juno is stupid, arrogant and not good at catching frisbee like he think!! He look like retard trying to catch frisbee! Very happy owners make him wear puke green sweater. Look so dumb! Juno just slave dog!!

Heidi give thanks to Lord for meat.

And cheese. Heidi like cheese.

Heidi also thankful to have opportunity to meet Alex Baldwin at Toronto International Film Festival. Very exciting to meet big star! Smell like ham, body secretions and chemicals!

Heidi also thankful her New Yorker Cartoon Caption chosen as finalist in contest. Heidi very smart and funny dog! Please vote for Heidi submission this week! It “You cat stink-face.”

Heidi thank you.