My wife’s tennis lessons

My wife just started taking tennis lessons from some dude from Buenos Aires.

I have to say that I wasn’t overly thrilled to hear this as it struck me as little more than hiring a gigolo for an hour each afternoon. In order to illustrate this point I told Rachelle that I had engaged the services of a woman from Brazil to give me shower lessons.

This is the letter that Rachelle wrote back to me:

Jesus Michael,

I’m taking tennis lessons. TENNIS LESSONS. And from what I can tell my instructor is about 65, overweight and barely speaks English. I think this is his retirement hobby. Seriously. This is his ad:

Whether you’re a begin, intermediate or advanced player, I can
teach you for enjoy a great tennis game.

What’s the point of playing tennis if you can’t continue 15 balls in continuation?
How’s your forehand and backhand?
You smash!?

When you play you spend more time pick up the ball than hitting, is that funny?

It is not funny.

I can help you gain consistency and you will love your game.
I am extremely technique pro so I can show you why you hit wrongly.

Doing so, I will built a solid rock to your game.
I have played tennis for the past 50 years and been teaching for the
past 20 years.
I would be happy to teach you in the North York area and surrounding areas of Toronto.

Tango Tennis!

I have experience teaching children, teenagers and adults. It’s never
too late to learn.

My rate is very affordable, only $10 /hour.

Now Michael, why don’t you tell me a little bit about your shower instructor?

****************************************

As marriage is all about sharing, I sent Rachelle the shower instructor’s post from Craig’s List:

Have trouble getting clean?

Are you feeling dirty?

Are you tired of same, old boring shower?

I can help.

I will clean you good, teach you best shower of life. Brazilian technique.

Stress of day wash right off your ready body.

No handicap people please.

Odete $150 / hour

I come to your house. You get wet.