Last week my wife Rachelle had a minor surgical procedure that required she be sedated. However, this was done in such a manner that although she wasn’t rendered unconscious, she wouldn’t remember anything from the experience. This made her curious as hell, wondering what sort of things she might be saying as she was in this transitional ether. As such, she asked me to document her twilight state as she returned to consciousness, and so I prepared a series of questions which I asked her as she was coming to and these are the results:
Me: Rachelle! Rachelle! Are you there?
Rachelle: ( Moves hand as if swatting fly)
Me: What is your favourite crop?
Rachelle: Crop?
Me: Yes, like corn, wheat, tobacco or peanuts.
Rachelle: Mmmm. Peanut butter cups.
Me: Okay, next question. Who is the sluttiest person that you know?
Rachelle: Slutty sluts. They’re all sluts. You know that.
Me: Good answer.
Rachelle: Thirsty.
Me: I will ask the nurse if you can have an ice cube. What is your favourite natural disaster?
Rachelle: Twister. So. Very. Windy. Hide in the basement when the twister comes! Very serious. Lives ruined.
Me: And crops, twisters ruin crops too.
Rachelle: Twisters are ruiners.
