These are the text messages I received from my wife Rachelle the other day:
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Rachelle: Who is Alexis?
Rachelle: The Bluetooth speaker thing that talks?
Rachelle: Pickle, her name isn’t Alexis, it’s Alexa.
Rachelle: Yes, I am sure.
Rachelle: Well, I don’t know why you think it’s Alexis. Did you ever stalk an Alexis when you were younger?
Rachelle: Oh. What was it called then if it wasn’t “stalking?”
Rachelle: “Displays of ardor.”
Rachelle: Fine.
Rachelle: Did you display a lot of ardor in your youth, Pickle?
Rachelle: Just committed to the idea of love. I see.
Rachelle: Yes.
Rachelle: Of course the question includes celebrities! Why wouldn’t it???
Rachelle: “Because it never went anywhere?!” Sweet Jesus, Pickle.
Rachelle: Alexis Carrington Colby. Who is she?
Rachelle: The evil ex-wife of Blake Carrington as played by Joan Collins on Dynasty?
Rachelle: Before my time.
Rachelle: Waaay before my time.
Rachelle: I sometimes forget just how old you are. It’s no wonder you’re having so much trouble with technology. If you don’t call her by the right name, then ALEXA won’t respond.
Rachelle: She doesn’t hate you.
Rachelle: She just not fluent in Picklese yet.
Rachelle: I’m glad you like the Christmas gift, though.
Rachelle: Jones certainly loves it.
Rachelle: So much shouting and shrieking as my two Alpha Males fight it out for dominance over the music.
Rachelle: Yes, Jones does seem to be winning.
Rachelle: I saw him push you over the other day so he could shout his choice at Alexa before you did!
Rachelle: I was. Very proud.
Rachelle: He’s a winner, Pickle.
Rachelle: And I have to admit, I do like his picks more than yours.
Rachelle: The Ants Go Marching, Ghostbusters, The Theme from Jaws? They’re classics.
Rachelle: You seem to request an awful lot of Garth Brooks.
Rachelle: Yeah, you’re right.
Rachelle: Very little of it gets played because of your elocution, I guess. Who is this Gary US Bonds Alexa keeps playing instead?
Rachelle: Another old timer, eh?
Rachelle: What did he die of?
Rachelle: Really??
Rachelle: Shut the front door!!
Rachelle: I mean, keeping a Boa as a pet just seems to be asking for trouble, but I guess they think differently down in Florida.
Rachelle: Live and let live, I guess.
Rachelle: Okay, the dentist just called me in, wish me luck, Pickle! xo