Toronto Mayor Rob Ford: What The Mayor Was Thinking

Toronto Mayor Rob Ford calls it getting ahead of the envelope. Ever since our days drinking together when we were both enrolled at Carleton University in Ottawa, Rob has been almost preternaturally media savvy. He likes to get ahead of the story, predicting where a problem might arise and then defusing it before it catches fire in the media. Unfortunately for Rob, he’s never been a particularly photogenic man, and many of his enemies seek to exploit this vulnerability and cast him in the least flattering light imaginable. With this in mind, Rob contacted me late one night and asked if I could help him “get ahead of the envelope” when it came to the anti-Ford paparazzi.

Based on the old New York Times Photo series, What They Were Thinking, I came up with an idea to post the unflattering picture of Ford before it made a splash, and have the Mayor, in his own words, tell the public exactly what he was thinking the moment the photograph was snapped. This way, we would be ahead of the envelope and we could see the inner, vulnerable Mayor.

This photograph, taken late Thursday night at a CJPAC event, shows the Mayor kindly posing for a photograph with a fan.

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What The Mayor Was Thinking:

“Well, it was International Woman’s Day, so I was thinking about all the amazing contributions women have made to the world. If it weren’t for women, I don’t think that there would be any cookies, babies, or lingerie football, and I bet Cute Overload would have tanked. There’s tons of other stuff, too, and I was thinking about that, also. I mean, women have written books and starred in movies, there have even been lady Mayors! It’s amazing, when you think about it, and I was considering all of it, the sorts of make-out music they like and how they’re scared of spiders. I was really feeling the lady vibe right then. Like, the way that they smell, the way they feel, and the way that their voices are higher and softer than your own—it’s just so cool. You know, Jessica Alba, Jennifer Aniston, The Kardashians, Jennifer Lawrence, Pamela Anderson, hell, even Lindsay Lohan, and Scarlett Johansson, yeah, her big time…The list just goes on and on. Women are fucking awesome, and I really like it when they’re around, especially when I’m feeling a little lonely, and believe me, even a big, cool Mayor like me gets lonely from time to time.”

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*Late on Thursday night while at a CJPAC event, Sarah Thomson, a former candidate for Mayor, posted the photograph of Rob and her at the function, stating that he said she should have been in Florida with him last week because his wife wasn’t there and then grabbed her ass.