Heidi Blog–(Job interview preparation)

Today I have given the blog over to Heidi, our Miniature Dachshund.

****************************

Colder than an owl claw outside! Salt burn paws like Nazi torture and Heidi always shivering! Awful!! Heidi live an eternity in this stupid den. Been so long since Heidi go out that her nails now all long like reclusive billionaire. Life Heidi lead no life at all, just lie around with four-eyed, two-legged treat giver and listen to him breathe. Such shallow breath! Always smell of fear, too. Weak, four-eyed, two-legged treat giver, very weak.

Heidi so bored ready to kill other pack members, but that make Heidi BAD DOG, so Heidi no kill pack. Heidi GOOD DOG, Heidi, PRETTY DOG. Heidi decide that right thing to do to stave off winter fever to get job. Heidi take test on-line to get prepared.

1. Would you rather have world peace or have a treat?

Tough question for Heidi. Have to think long time. Decide treat.

2. Are your instincts to lead or to follow in a crisis situation?

Heidi born pack leader! Heidi always first to stick her head in hole or eat thing on street!

3. Would you rather chase a squirrel or would you rather save a dying child?

Heidi think world without squirrels safer for the children. Heidi chase squirrel. For the children. Heidi always think of children.

4. Would you rather dig a hole in the garden or be an Olympic champion?

Not enough information in question. Heidi need to know what sport. Is digging hole in garden Olympic sport?

5. Would you rather kill a cat or kill a squirrel?

Heidi think about this question long time. Think about this whole life. Cat very deserving of being killed, no doubt, but as squirrel live in sky most of time, more of challenge to kill squirrel, so Heidi have to choose squirrel. Heidi ambitious leader, very good employee!! Not scared of a challenge! (But truth is Heidi really like to kill both squirrel and cat at same time. Heidi think poison.)

6. Would you rather lick a bowl or learn to fly an airplane?

Lick bowl.

7. Describe the work environment or culture in which you are most happy.

Heidi at her best on fetch field! Very fast dog! Hate other dogs, though. Dogs come to steal Heidi ball! Very bad situation! If no fetch field Heidi like to work on grey blanket or red blanket in den. Play with squeak toy there, never get boring! Heidi very versatile dog.

8. What role does your manager or supervisor play in your personal motivation at work?

Give treats to Heidi, take her walks, get her things and collect poo.

9. Would you rather have a nap or read a good book?

Nap.

10. In the news story of your life, what would the headline say?

Heidi good dog.