Heidi Blog

Today I have given The Blog over to Heidi, our Miniature Dachshund:

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Know Paw Patrol?

It really big deal.

Cartoon for two-legged pups.

Make billions of treats and bones for bloated two-leggers who exploit worker dogs.

They assholes.

Heidi bite every one of them in most vulnerable spot.

Heidi imagine so much blood. So many two-legger screaming. Pools of enemy blood everywhere, Heidi lap it up. Help Heidi fall asleep thinking of such things. Make her happy.

HAHAHAHA!

So fun!

Heidi ask know Marshall?

He fireman/paramedic dog on Paw Patrol.

Dalmatian.

He big deal.

He party with Peppa the Pig, Dora the Explorer, Boss Baby and Iggy Azalea.

So pretty big.

Heidi screw him.

It true.

Many times.

Marshall CRAZY about Heidi.

Would not leave her alone. Would not stop licking Heidi. And let Heidi tell you, what they say about Dalmatians is true. Big dick. Very big. Black blotches on white. Chocolate and vanilla. Heidi like that very much. Heidi a little bit kinky. A sexual adventurer. But what Heidi no like is Marshall. He not smart and very negative!! All he do when not talking about career is complain. “No way,” Heidi say! “You take all your negative energy to the Twitter and leave Heidi alone!”

So yeah, Heidi broke up with him.

Heidi don’t care about Paw Patrol money. Heidi just care about being happy and eating and killing.

Heidi no respond to friend request on Facebook from Marshall.

It over.

Heidi simple dog.

Heidi very, very good dog.